17th February 2016

Hello Sam, I hope you are well and enjoying school. I think about you lots son and I was off work today, I took the day off to do some painting and I was thinking about you a lot. I remember the time when you were born Sam, its a feeling I will never forget and one day hope you will experience this feeling too when you have children of your own and make me a proud grandfather. Fatherhood is strange son, to know the little bundle of joy (which was you) will grow up and experience the world. When you become a father you know there is someone on this earth who you would be willing to die for without premeditation but also someone you live for. I worry about how you are son, I am not there to give you the words of encouragement that I want to. I am not there to cheer you when your sad and watch that beautiful smile of yours light up my life when your happy, but I will tell you this son, you are always in my heart and never does an hour pass when I don't think about you and never do I make a plan for the future without considering you in it too. I love you Sam, always have and always will. Its not a choice of mine that I am not there with you just now but I promise you I will never shop fighting to be in your life. You are my son Sam, I am your father and the only father you will ever have, I am so proud of you son and I am trying hard to be part of your life again. If anyone ever tells your different then they are wrong Sam, I have never and never will give up of you son, you are part of me and I am part of you, love you always. Do you remember this picture Sam? You wired up a radio, your a clever boy Sam and I am so very proud you are my son.

Love you always son....Daddy x

14th February 2016

Hi Sam, Good morning son, its a chilling frosty sunday morning as i write this message to you. I hope you are well and enjoying your weekend. Granny is getting better and is asking for you lots, I tell her you are sending your love and say asks me to say she loves and misses you. I would like to share a photo with you sam...

This is a photo of me shaking your hand just hours after you were born, you grasped my finger then and i was so very happy and proud of you then and I remain proud of you now and just like 12 years ago when I was there in that neonatal ward seated beside your incubator watching over you and caring for you, now today and always I feel the same and am always here for you when ever you need me. You are my son and my best friend, no one can replace you just as no one can replace me as your father. When you were in hospital for 5 months as a baby i traveled from Falkirk to the hospital in stirling twice a day to be with you, feed you, hold you and care for you. These 5 months I took off my work and only returned to work when you came home and you were healthy. I returned to work so I would be paid so then I could buy you the food, clothes and toys you needed and pay the bills for our home. Each and every evening when I returned home from work you and I use to play, I loved holding you as a little baby, I loved your hugs and I need these hugs now Sam cause I miss you my son and will never give up fighting to have you in my life again.

Never forget what it was like when you and I were together Sam, always remember with your own mind how I love you and play with you, never allow anyone to tell you different cause I loved you then as I love you now and will love you forever son. Daddy

7th Feb 2016

Hi Sam, I hope you are doing fine and settled into this new year well. I hope all is good at school, this is a big year for you as you will soon me moving to the high school. Granny has left the hospital and is back to her nursing home. I am sorry to say that her health is not good but I have told her that you are missing her and love her very much. I know you would want me to say this as this is how you feel as you love her loads but can't see her just now due to no fault of your own. I have put a video of Granny on YouTube which you can access her son... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqKOc9pA00E As you can hear Sam, Granny remembers you well and is calling you a great boy when she looks at your picture because she loves you. I love you too and miss you very much. I hope this rain has not stopped you playing football at school and I hope you are still interested in rugby. I miss taking you swimming Sam, can you remember the games we played in the pool? The one you invested called taxi where you are on my back and grab be around the neck and I have to swim with you on me like that. Never forget the good times son or allow anyone to make you think differently. I miss you and want you here with me again son and I will never stop fighting until i see you again as you are my son, my best friend and always my motivation, i love you Sam. Daddy